WARNING

PRE-SCREENING: WE MIGHT NOT BE THE BEST FIT IF…
• you have a social media avatar that shows you drinking coffee out of an oversized mug
• you are a slam poet who claps using fingers
• you have a live, laugh, love aesthetic
• you write nerdy genre stuff steeped in pop culture and/or that “remixes high and low”
• you publicly admit to having seen the latest Star Wars
• you are an outrage bot who bloviates on Twitter all day
• you pay attention to award shows like the Oscars and the National Book Awards
• you write stuff that is political in the way Vox or Fox is
• you call yourself an “Americanist”
• you would buy a book because of a Michiko Kakutani blurb